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My entire life I have loved working with children - helping them grow, explore, and learn about life. I spent four years learning about how individuals develop, how community systems should work, and numerous tactics on how to positively influence a person's life. I am eager to put my knowledge to use in a meaningful setting! Is that so much to ask from the job market?!
My sentiments about my future career run along these lines: "I hope to never live a lavish lifestyle. I never want money to be the motivation for the work I do. I never want money to be the worth of the work I do." I have known for quite a while now that working in the nonprofit sector means I probably will never make much money, but I have accepted and come to love this fact. Wanna pay me $12 an hour. Fine, no biggie. Just give me a worthwhile cause!
I am currently on a break before going back to get my masters degree, but have often found myself wishing I hadn't taken a break just to fulfill my selfish need to be useful. The choices in graduate degree specialties overwhelm me because I cannot decide the best avenue for my career.
Do I want to be a play therapist? Do I want to work with normally developing children or children with specials needs? Do I want to be a marriage and family therapist? Do I want to work intervention with broken families and individuals or work prevention with families and individuals at risk? Do I want to be a social worker? Where can I utilize my talents to their fullest capacity?
And do you know what I hate the most right now about being unsuccessful in my job hunt? Feeling like a waste. Not a waste of space or anything of that sort, but almost like I am wasting my prosocial tendencies. It is hard to put an exact name to this feeling.
I already know being patient is my best bet for working this all out (the job hunting and the feeling of uselessness). So I remind myself everyday "time will tell", "que sera, sera", etc. But frankly, that doesn't ward off the blues quite as well as I would hope. Instead, what really restored my sense of faith in myself was a conversation with a good friend of mine, L. We are all familiar with the aphorism, "when life gives you lemons, make lemonade" right? Essentially this means to use the bad things in your life to make something good. Yes?
Over the years, this phrase has received a number of pessimistic and hilarious adaptations, with a few of my favorite being:
- "When life gives you lemons, throw them back and demand chocolate."
- "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade...But damn, there is only so much lemonade I can make!"
- "When life gives you lemons, just say 'fuck the lemons', and bail."
- "When life gives you lemons, throw them back at life and see if life will make that same mistake again!"
- "When life gives you lemons, ask yourself how exactly can an anthropomorphic personification of something immaterial like life give me a fruit?"
But my conversation with L about optimism and lemons went somewhere totally different and completely made my pissy mood worthwhile (as well as curing it). The conversation was something like this:
Me: I am starting to feel a teeny bit anxious that I won't ever find a job.
L: Oh, you'll find one - smart girls like us always find something!
Me: Look at your optimism! That is totally what I need to get refill for - my optimism tank.
L: Well I don't know if you got the memo, but the motto is no longer making lemonade from lemons - it's putting your foot up life's ass and getting your way.I am so thankful for great friends who remind me to always laugh at myself and at life. And as the Doctor says, "Rule 27: Never knowingly be serious" (Season 6, Ep 8). Life is too short, eh? So I am going to keep on keepin' on and I believe that I will eventually get it right. Love, love, love to you all!
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Dear Lemons,
ReplyDeleteThis does not sound like the Alycia that we've come to know and love. It's probably the weather in Seattle, it is overcast and rainy all the time there, whereas in Texas it never rains (these days). Keep trying and be patient, the right job will come, after all, Obama said he was laser focused on the job market and that has to mean something right? (sorry for the cheap political shot). Everyone has their lemon days, but making lemonade is not the answer. The answer is coffee. Go to your local Starbucks (or Sweet Cheeks) coffee house, order 3 very large Latte's, drink them down quickly, rotate in a circle 3 times (actually this doesn't help, but after 3 coffees you'll feel like doing it anyways). You'll be so pumped full of caffeine that you'll talk everyone's ear off in the coffee house and someone will give you a job just to shut you up. I've never done this, but it's a well known home remedy on Mars. Cheer up. There is no equivalent word for Blues on Mars except owgheisw, which is just a word that means a wavelength towards the higher end of the visual spectrum. We miss you guys, Alien from Mars.
Mr. Mars,
ReplyDeleteI like the way you think. Coffee sounds like a fantastic solution except that we happen to be on a spending freeze for all non-necessities. Matt doesn't drink coffee so he has banned it from our purchasing list for the time being (once I get a job I am drinking all the coffee my heart desires!). I could try drinking an entire pitcher of green tea but I do not think the effect would be the same! I will be sure to keep this Martian remedy on file :-)
I think family time is an awesome cure for the blues. When you all come to visit (soon?!) we will prove its not all clouds and rain here. We miss you! Give gama and gampa big hugs from us!
Alycia,
ReplyDeleteI felt the strong urge to comment on this post because I know exactly how you feel! I have been looking for the same type of job (nonprofit) since June and have just been desperate to find something. I am in a very weird limbo right now... and the hardest thing for me about it is that I have no control over what happens! What really keeps me from going crazy about it is that I know that when I eventually, hopefully get that job it will be the perfect one. Anyways, I just thought I would share with you. Just keep your chin up girl and trust that something will come along! Love reading your blog by the way.. I think it's awesome that you and Matt moved to Seattle. -Erin
Dearest Alycia,
ReplyDeleteYou forgot "When life gives you lemons, buy a bottle of vodka and have a party!"
Look at all of this free time you have to cook delicious recipes and pass them on to others (totally making spinach dip tonight...) So just know that you're not being a waste, because you're still inspiring people with your indestructible optimism and your progressive eco-friendly ways. Trust me when I say that your ability to inspire transcends the entire damn Pacific Ocean AND an entire CONTINENT, all the way to a pinpoint on a map called Perth. Whatever you do, don't give up. -K
@Erin - Job hunting can be awful, I really appreciate your solidarity, sister! Your advice is so right - the wait is going to be worth it when I find a job I enjoy. Good luck with your job hunting and let the optimism flow! Also, thanks for reading the blog. Hopefully something epic will happen soon to help keep your interest :)
ReplyDelete@Kathleen - I would throw a vodka flavored party if I had anyone to party with (excluding Matt). I champagne celebrated myself into the toilet two weeks ago. You would think I would have learned by now that partying is just too hardcore for me! Also, my eco-friendly ways aren't so progressive on this side of the country, which means I will have to try harder! Never fear. I will not give up!