Work, work, work for the busy bee

Oh my goodness. Where to begin?

Things have been crazy hectic on my end, hence the lack of updates. Two days after Matt and I celebrated our anniversary, my mom came to stay with us for a week. We acted like tourists and took in all the sights and ate delicious food. White truffle pesto, Dungeness crab, a double chocolate cookie lavender ice cream sandwich, calamari steak, lavender lemon cookies, figs on pizza, and  the list goes on and on. It was an interesting to see my life and this city through someone else's eyes.

Immediately after my mom left town, I started working part-time on-call relief (8 – 24 hours per week on average) for the domestic violence shelter (DV) I had been volunteering with since January. New jobs are never easy, especially ones that deal with crisis work, and DV is no exception. This position has been amazingly exciting and absurdly stressful but I am incredibly happy to be with such a wonderful agency doing work that I am proud of.

My part-time serving job at Olga's has morphed into a full-time position with the change in management in May. We got a new general manager (who is wonderful) and lost half the serving staff within a few weeks (not everyone enjoys change). Olga's is in the process of hiring and training new people, but nothing happens quickly in a corporate company so until then we're all sharing the strain with fewer days off, busier work days and shorter breaks.

Between being full time at Olga's, part time with DV, keeping my volunteer hours with Planned Parenthood and commuting across the metropolis, I have been a very busy bee. It's fun to have a full planner again, but I'm ready to find a balance that leans a bit more towards the leisure side than I'm currently sporting (more hiking in my Seattle summer please!).

Matt has been wonderfully supportive and is often the only reason I survive the madness of daily life. Our kitten Ere and her adorable furry face being survival mechanism #2. When these things aren't quite curing the insanity, I take several big deep breaths and just let it go. Life moves on.

"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and
absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall
begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense."
-Emerson

Our One Year Wedding Anniversary!

I've been considering what to write for this commemorative post for several weeks now. Did I want to reminisce about our wedding, discuss the ways that we've grown as a couple over the past year, wax poetical about love and marriage in general terms? I even looked back to my journal for inspiration. What I found there made me laugh:

January 18th, 2011

Official confirmation of plans to wed.

January 23rd, 2011

Is this really happening? To me?! I am 110% ready to marry Matt and spend the rest of my life with him. I do not doubt that we can conquer and work through anything that comes our way. One big rule: we will NOT be the gender stereotypical husband & wife, but partner & spouse. Things have been so crazy and I really need more to time to relax but life is running me ragged! Maybe next weekend? I promise myself right now that this will NOT get out of hand. I will have a beautiful celebration but not at the expense of my sanity or anyone else's. What I care about wedding-wise: spending time with my family and Matt's family; a pretty, simple dress; a clean, handsome suit; two comfortable rings. Screw the rest!

March 6th, 2011

Talking to Matt on the phone - today has been stressful - the past few weeks have been stressful. I bought a dress for the wedding celebration. SIGH. Things have gotten difficult. Fast. But I guess we will survive. This will all end soon. 10 week countdown to May 15th, 2011!

And that is the last post in my journal. A few months after my last entry, I started this blog but that is a lame excuse for my absence in a journaling habit I've kept over the past decade. In my defense, I think that the 5 months of our engagement were the craziest, busiest and most emotional months that I've experienced since I was a wild and hormonal thirteen year old.

Anyway, after great indecision I finally decided to share the two pieces of relationship advice that have stayed on my mind over the past year. The first nugget of marriage wisdom comes from Matt's cousin, Autumn, who wrote to us and said, "There is no magic formula for a successful marriage, only love, trust, honesty and open communication. When all else fails there is always paper, rock and scissors to help with compromises!"

I love this advice because it demonstrates the basic tenets of any good relationship (love, trust, honesty, and open communication) while admitting 1) that marriage takes effort and 2) what works for one marriage won't necessarily work for another. It also recognizes that comprise and humor are useful tools when problems arise (which they undoubtedly will)!

The second piece of advice came from a random gentleman at the grocery store. Matt and I were debating the merits of different coffee brands and flavors when he approached us. He told us that we reminded him of a younger version of himself & his wife who came to pick out their daily brew just after being married forty three years ago! After telling us this adorable anecdote, he cautioned us with a gentle phrase, "Hang in there. Stay in love."

At first, the phrase "stay in love" seemed a little too generic to be good advice, but after reflecting for a while I think I understood what he meant. He meant that we should stay fond of each other as people, stay interested in the daily things and small quirks, stay connected and aware of one another. All those little things that people in love do without a second thought. 

Why those two pieces of wisdom have stuck with me, I don't know but I like them and there is comfort in knowing that good advice is out there, even if we don't really need it just yet, still being newlyweds and all. One year down, seventy eight years to go (I'm going to live to be a hundred, don't cha know)!

Anniversary Dinner Date!

Mothers & Daughters

Happy Mother's Day to all the amazing Moms that I know, including Grandma's and Momma's-to-be! Where would we be without y'all? In honor of day, I thought I would share  my absolute favorite Mother's Day postsecret card ever posted and a heartbreakingly beautiful letter:

The Found Essay: Letter from a Mother to a Daughter

“My dear girl, the day you see I’m getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I’m going through. If when we talk, I repeat the same thing a thousand times, don’t interrupt to say: “You said the same thing a minute ago.” Just listen, please. Try to remember the times when you were little and I would read the same story night after night until you would fall asleep. 

When I don’t want to take a bath, don’t be mad and don’t embarrass me. Remember when I had to run after you making excuses and trying to get you to take a shower when you were just a girl? When you see how ignorant I am when it comes to new technology, give me the time to learn and don’t look at me that way. Remember, honey, I patiently taught you how to do many things like eating appropriately, getting dressed, combing your hair, and dealing with life’s issues every day. 

The day you see I’m getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I’m going through. If I occasionally lose track of what we’re talking about, give me the time to remember, and if I can’t, don’t be nervous, impatient, or arrogant. Just know in your heart that the most important thing for me is to be with you. And when my old, tired legs don’t let me move as quickly as before, give me your hand the same way that I offered mine to you when you first walked. 

When those days come, don’t feel sad—just be with me, and understand me while I get to the end of my life with love. I’ll cherish and thank you for the gift of time and joy we shared. With a big smile and the huge love I’ve always had for you, I just want to say, I love you, my darling daughter.”

Essay courtesy of Spring In The Air